“The best laid plans of mice and men often go awry…”
And here’s my addition, “So why do I even try.”
Hi. My name is Jaye and I am a recovering planner.
Life is so funny sometimes. This whole summer, I learned time and time again that sometimes good things happen when you just let go, unclench your fist and let it happen.
As someone who color-codes her moleskin planner, has a to-do list for everything and has a list of goals, that my friends, is terrifying.
This summer there was a seismic shift in everything. I moved from a home I absolutely loved, quit my job and uprooted to go back to school. It’s not surprising that my coping method was to plan. That way, even with all the changes, I had some idea of what was going to happen, right? Wrong. The more I clenched my first about different things, the more things slipped out of my fingers.
I tried it with my best friend.
And I tried it with law school.
It was funny to me to go back and read those two post now that I know the ending.
SO…since I’ve been eerily quiet on here for the past two months, I wanted to tell you all how this worked out so that you can laugh with me and see how funny and strange it is that sometimes when we just let go, it all falls into place.
Here it is, the beginning of one of my favorite months and I’m almost 6 weeks into law school at…my #1 choice! After I wrote the Plan B post, I gave in. I planned on going to my #2 school, which was a great one as well. I went to visit with the family on our way to vacation, got an apartment, my schedule, did my summer reading and was ready to go.
On one of the last days in Michigan, we went into town and I had a couple of messages so I dialed the number, keyed in my password and sat to listen. My heart stopped when it was a message from the admissions dept of my #1 choice for law school. I’m not sure I heard anything that was between his name and “call me back.”
I called back immediately but it was too late to get to him. I tried to calmly leave a message then I hung up and tried not to go insane. This was it. This was either my no for sure or maybe, just maybe, I had a spot. I was a wreck that night.
The next day we were going to visit family. I got in the car and listened to my ipod trying to drown out the “what if” thoughts that kept swirling around in my head. I looked down at my phone and I had one missed call. Are you kidding me. It was them. I called back and left another message, again trying to be calm and probably failing miserably.
A couple of minutes later he calls back, we start to talk and it cuts out. AGH! This is the one time in my life I’ve ever hated northern Michigan. Cell service is horrid. This is then followed by my dad pulling on and off the road trying to find service. Finally I get on the phone with him and he said he had great news.
I was in! I was in! I was in!
To say I was excited would be a gross understatement. When we pulled in for breakfast, even though I try not to do it, I had to call the Boy at work. We were both so excited! He was probably more excited that his girlfriend wouldn’t be so batty now that this was over 😉 All the studying, the tests, the applications, the recommendations, writing samples and waiting was done. I was headed to the school I wanted to go to.
Now I just had to get all my stuff packed, re-route plans and get to Cincinnati before orientation started in a week. THAT’S where my planning skills could kick in.
And now, 6 weeks into this, I have so much to tell you all! I can’t thank you enough for all of your encouragement and making me smile through this whole process so many how many times I have to learn the lesson that seems so dang simple…just let go!
I have the sneaking suspicion someone was trying to teach me patience. I think part of the reason I plan is because then you know what’s coming ahead of the curve. I hate waiting till the last-minute to know what’s going on. And getting me to be patient is probably like pulling teeth. But I have learned this summer about the beauty of knowing what you want, working hard to get it and then relaxing in the fact that things will happen as they are supposed to happen. And I can’t rush it. HA.
So I have the feeling I’ll always be a planner (especially now when they tell us our lives are going to be planned out in 6 minute increments…are you kidding me?!?! I’m not even that crazy 😉 but I’m also learning that sometimes, you just have to wing it.