Tough Conversations with Kids – Let’s Talk About Sex

“Listen earnestly to anything your children want to tell you, no matter what.  If you don’t listen eagerly to the little stuff when they are little, they won’t tell you the big stuff when they are big, because to them all of it has always been big stuff.” ~ Catherine M. Wallace

Nothing strikes quite as much fear in the hearts of parents as the thought of having “the talk” with their child.

Amidst the nausea and panic that immediately set in, there are the questions: When do you have it? What do you say? How do you say it? What if you say the wrong thing? What if they ask a question you don’t know the answer to? Don’t they cover this in school?

These are the questions I already have . . . and my eldest is just barely out of diapers.

But here’s the good news – early, candid conversations with your child about tough topics, like puberty and sex, help set your child and family up for success for years to come. And who wouldn’t want that?

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For tips on jumpstarting the conversation with your son or daughter, check out my latest post on the Birmingham Moms Blog where Dr. Stephenie Wallace, mom, certified Girlologist, and part of the Adolescent Health Center team at Children’s of Alabama gives some tips on how to get started.

 

Learning How to Enjoy the Moment

“Children are not a distraction from more important work.  They are the most important work.” ~ C.S. Lewis

I have a sneaking suspicion.

I suspect that if each of us thought back to the advice we received while pregnant, one of the top ten most-received tidbits would be, “Enjoy the moment.”

However, the problem is, while family, friends, co-workers, and even complete strangers are quick to offer this bit of advice, no one tells you how to do that.

No one tells you how to “enjoy the moment” when your newborn has day/night confusion and you are running on less than three hours of sleep.

No one tells you how to “enjoy the moment” when your potty-training toddler has his or her fifth accident that day and you’re up to your elbows in poop, laundry, and Clorox wipes.

No one tells you how to “enjoy the moment” when your patience (and nerves) are shot from dealing with a contrary toddler that just.won’t.listen.

Forget about enjoying the moment, we are just trying to survive it.

That’s where I found myself recently. Then, while having breakfast with the boys, I looked out the window and saw the school bus pass by. Inexplicably, my heart leapt.  I could feel a swelling deep in my gut.

These sweet, albeit chaotic, mornings with my two boys are numbered. All too soon they won’t want to sit down and tell me about the dragons they slayed in their dreams over toast.  They may not laugh at the silly faces I make, or ask me ten times to do the robot voice that makes them laugh so hard they get the hiccups.

Then that advice came echoing back, “Enjoy the moment.”

Sitting at the table that morning, I resolved not to squander these moments. However, then I had to come up with a game plan to actually follow the advice I had been given.

Read the rest of this post on the Birmingham Moms Blog.

With a Name Like Caesar, He Was Destined for Greatness

The best way to get a puppy is to beg for a baby brother — and they’ll settle for a puppy every time.” ~Winston Pendleton

The picture that got me in trouble

I have a bone to pick with Pendleton. I begged for a puppy and got a baby brother. I got two actually and a sister thrown in as a bonus. Four kids, no puppy. Mom didn’t want something else to feed or clean up after. But honestly, can you blame her?

I can only fault my parents for three things in my childhood development:
1. Not taking us to Disney
2. Taking us to a Cracker Barrel which I am convinced is what stunted my growth
3. Not letting us have a dog- it’s ok, I had hermit crabs. Better than fish at least.

Luckily I’ve been able to make right on at least one of them. I now have a dog. His name is Caesar. No, I did not give him that name, he had it when I got him and I just couldn’t bring myself to change it. I mean how many dogs do you know with that name. Beats the hell out of Spot. Caesar’s brothers consisted of Marc Antony, Julius and Napoleon. Truth be told, I originally inquired about Napoleon, but he was taken. Don’t tell Caesar. I think I got the best dictator anyway.

He could hardly hold his head up when he was a pup

I’m not sure quite how I ended up with the little monster. I always wanted a dog and had thought about it for awhile but never mentioned it to anyone. One day I told the Boy I was going to get a dog, looked on Petfinder and the next day we were off to the shelter in Anna, Illinois. I was pumped and so was the Boy, who unlike me was raised by parents who loved him and therefore bought him and his brother a dog 😉

I was excited until about 10 minutes away from the shelter. We pulled up and I was going over an escape plan in my head. Thank goodness the Boy was there or I may have turned right back, around tail between my legs, and headed to Nashville. I sat in the chair filling out the paperwork and the woman said, “Would you like me to go get him?” Could I still say no? Within seconds, Caesar was on the scene. With a head too big for his body and ears that made him look like Dumbo, he ran out to us. You mean from here on out I’m responsible for keeping this thing alive? The only thing I kept alive up till then was a Christmas tree and orchids. Again, thank God the Boy was there because he was the proper kind of excited. You know, the, “It’s Christmas morning and I’m getting a puppy” kind of excited. I was terrified, probably more like the parents feel of said child and puppy on Christmas morning. But after four hours in the car with the little guy sleeping on my lap, I was hooked.

Caesar or C$ (one of his many nicknames) just turned two and my little rat terrier who was supposed to be max of 30 pounds is now 50.  Every time the vet looks at his records he shakes his head and says, “That’s the biggest rat terrier I’ve ever seen.” As far as he can guess, my little monster must have some pit in him. He just has the best demeanor. Sure he eats running socks, takes over the bed when you let him up and occasionally makes you run a little faster on your runs when he sees a squirrel but he always brings a smile to

Batdog. He still sleeps like this.

my face with his crazy dinner circle dance, the Simmie shake, his unmatched love of peanut butter, his fear of tiny dogs and the way he curls up and tucks his nose in the crook of your arm when you’re reading. He’s also a fantastic running partner even though it is slightly annoying that I always seem to be the one panting like a dog.He’s the best little monkey I could ask for and he has taught me a lot about being selfless and patient. The boy (or as the instructor from our dog obedience class called him…the dog whisperer) was right, you just can’t be in a bad mood when you have a dog.

Now to work on getting to Disney…

See more pictures of C$